Said by Ned

I havn't written on my Blog for a long time. Maybe it's a case of writers BLOG or something. But I realised this morning that this will be my 99th Blog entry, so its time to crack the century any day now. Last weekend saw me perform a Marriage Ceremony as Dr. Who. In fact my role was to play the well known Tom Baker version of Dr. Who.  The bride arrived in a Tardis...I dont know if she travelled from another time or place, across the galaxies, from a far away planet on the edge of Eternity, or not. I think she came from Melbourne. Or near there.  The Wedding theme was based on the episode of Dr Who and Vincent...Dr Who meets Vincent Van Gogh in one extraordinaryly fantastic and moving episode. Its worth looking it up and watching it. I loved the Dr Who wedding theme and I want a Tardis for keeps. I WANT A TARDIS I want a Tardis in my Back yard, among my pine tree forest Where I can contemplate nothing and let my mind get ...

THE MISSING MANGO Ahhh, the Giant mango went missing, And the locals, they are all hissing! How could a thief stoop so low, As to steal the mascot Mango Up there in Bowen its hot And thieving is something that’s not Accepted by locals with relish Except when its mango embellished How do you steal such a fruit 10 tonnes if you please just to boot The size of a house tis at least Those responsible will have quite a feast Police are seeking a person with high levels of Vitamin C Possibly harbouring a hive of mad bees Chin all sticky from the juice of a mango My God, how low can one go. Good news, the mango found   not far away Hiding in bushes they say, Proof it seems, if you ask me, That the mango never falls far from the Tree !! Ned Hoskin www.wedbyned.com.au 0402 31 75 31

I just LOVE being a Marriage Celebrant! Oh to be the King of Hearts, surrounded by Love and Good will, Swooned by Music and beautiful words, you never lose the thrill! Will you take this man to be, Your King and You , His Queen? To Love for a Thousand Years, and live in an eternal Dream? Will you take her heart and care for it, will she care for your heart too, Treated with Love and Dignity, It will last your whole Life through. I hope that I am your King of Hearts, As you are my Maiden Queen, You are the one I was looking for, You are my Mary Magdaleine! I want to travel to the stars and back, and never leave your side And laugh and live and love with you no matter how tough the ride I want to spend my treasured years and all my waking days Showing that my Love for you, works in a Thousand different ways. I Love to be the King of Hearts, I love to see them glow, The Couple as they stand and say " I love you forever, so..." 'I want to be your Robi...

BUDGET PRICED HAIR CUTS HIT PORTARLINGTON It has been reported here today that a new Cut-price Cutter has entered the market in Portarlington. In fact, this does add a new dimension to a 'Back-yarder' entering the scene. As you can see by the accompanying photograph, the business claims to have fewer overheads...in fact no over-heads for that matter. "Furniture is...well...minimalist" said the owner Big Mike, who asked that his surname not be used...since he cant spell it anyway!  When we arrived, a happy Customer, Kamil, seemed to be enjoying the experience. "I dont mind holding the mirror up while having my hair cut.......But holding it up for other clients is stretching it a bit " he said Big Mike explained that "Our shop design has been well thought out...the retail section is seen clearly in the back ground. It is somewhat understated and has that certain   Je ne sais pas"  he said. Certainly the new hair sa...

Paula's Dad, from Ireland has been here for his annual pilgrimmage. Whilst here I started to pen the words for a little song. It has turned out Australiana rather than Irish. Sang to the tune (of course) of Waltzing Matilda. Enjoy! ( I hope) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9fq01PWhPyM&feature=youtu.be   Wee Irish Billy   (sung to Waltzing Matilda) Wee Irish Billy , came out from Ireland,   He flew over the land and the sea, 10,000 miles,   with a twinkle and smiles, He even flew, e-con-om-y. He came to see his Paula His fair maiden Daughter, In the Land that we all   know as Down Under, Where the heat and the thunder, and the wine makes us chunder, In Australia our thirst,   is so legendary. Wee Irish Billy came out from Ireland, He flew over the land and the sea, 10,000 miles,   with a twinkle and smiles,   He even flew, e-con-om-y. He drank all our beer,   so then he started on our ...

I don't know where they went, No idea why they suddenly left My good black shoes have left me bereft! For years they walked me up and down the bridal aisle, But now, well, my ( sole) can't raise a smile, Where did they go, oh why did they leave, Surely they couldn't be quite that peeved... The Left  was my favourite...although I sure miss the Right, I dream about them constantly, lost in the night, Perhaps walking a lonely road, in search of a sole mate, Always unsure, of their leathery fate! How devoted they seemed, such supportive of friends, But now I can't even try make amends Come home good shoes, let me polish you in black I'll wait up all night, if you'd only come back I promise to give you an over-haul if you like And even take you for a joy ride on my bike I promise to never take you for granted, or treat you a-miss If you come back today, I'll even give you a kiss Where did you go, oh, why did you walk? If only we could sit d...

We were talking about Walk-sox, for no apparent reason. In our house, we talk about all kinds of things including all kinds of people. However, walk-sox has never been a part of the banter, and to be honest, I don't remember how or why we got onto the subject. My first immediate vision was of a skinny legged older man, standing with his long sox held up by a 'garter', all nobbly kneed and purple veins looking like old road maps,  sploshy and purple and veiny, poking out the top of the said 'Walk-sox'. Until, I very quickly remembered a skinny legged young boy, also wearing them. That skinny legged boy was me, and in fact I will place a photograph in here to prove it. OK, so the photograph proves nothing other than skinny legs and shorts, in the format of a suit. I cant find the walk-sox photos yet, but I will. Being of the baby-boomer period myself, I was one of those kids who wasnt allowed to wear long pants until going to High School! Even our little grey S...